I had you five times yesterday.
You were not particularly sweet, but boy, were you comforting.
I was curious about you. I reached out towards you – with just the right blend of indifference and conviction.
I did not want you. In my head were all these reasons not to let you in my life, reasons valid in any situation.
It was an irrational decision. Then again, the move was as good as never having decided at all.
I held you between my fingertips and as your faint light burned, I took you into my system.
But you never reached so deep.
You were through before I could feel you.
I did not want you, but I wanted to feel the entire you. So I reached for you once again.
I never craved you. For a long time, I was fine without you. I could have lasted a much longer time without ever getting a taste of you again.
I never missed you, but a small part of me missed the experience of you.
Once again I struck up a flame for you.
You burned. But you would always burn out before I could fully enjoy you.
Perhaps you were never meant to give me enjoyment. But I was happy, if only just for the time that you kept me company and you stayed alight.
I immersed myself in your flavor: a flavor so empowering, it took hold of my senses. While the thought that I could reach for you at any time of my choosing made me feel so potent, I was a slave to you in that you always dictated how I felt. I surrendered myself entirely to you – and that, in turn, would give me a feeling of freedom. Freedom so real, so natural, yet devastatingly untrue.
You were always true to me. It was an act of honesty, every moment we committed to one another. I always knew you’d slip away before I’d had enough of you. I didn’t care.
You were wrong for me in the first place.
I had you five times yesterday, a few times a long way back. Perhaps those times will never be enough, because of what you are. I can change such that I might let myself have less or more, or none at all; but in spite of me, you will hold on stubbornly to your nature.
You are the same regardless of whom you’re with. Perhaps it is the constancy you carry with you that makes you so appealing.
But appeal is just that – appeal. Nothing worth craving, and certainly nothing worth risking an addiction.
For who I am, and what I can do, matters more than what you are. Soon enough, you’ll be gone from my life as quickly as you had entered.
And it will be as if I never knew you at all.
(Title borrowed from The Platters’ “Smoke Gets in Your Eyes”)
So be thankful, for all the blessings. Even for the pain, which may be a blessing in disguise without your knowing.
Be thankful for everything.
Friendly tip: A map would come into good use for this endeavor. (Map of UP Diliman, via Google Image Search)
So you were unable to get those subjects you wanted, and now you’re forced to prerog. You’d very much like to, except you don’t know how. To make things worse, some trippy senior might have even told you a horror story of how prerog is likenable to having to stand before snarling teachers (aka executioners) who don’t appreciate the fact that everyone’s already at the gallows and you still have to set a schedule for the torture chamber, and having to scream “Abracadabra” before a wall that you just saw slam shut in your face. In reality, prerogging is easy if you know the procedure (and if you’ve got a hint of strategic spark in you), and through a short series of steps I will show you how. This article assumes two things: that you are currently a student in UP Diliman, and that you were unable to get the subjects you had indicated on your pre-enlistment “survey demand form” during the first, second, third, fourth, on to infinity batch run.
(For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term “batch run,” it is a multi-leg marathon scheduled weeks before the scheduled enrolment date wherein UP students are assigned numbers and made to race to the finish line. At each leg of the race, random numbers are picked as winners. Not literally, of course, though I would personally argue that there is a great amount of accuracy in that description.)
First of all, let’s get down to a definition of terms. “Prerog” is short for “prerogative,” a term in the English language which means “an exclusive or special right, power, or privilege” (Merriam Webster Dictionary), because Filipinos love word contractions and UP students like to provide nicknames for commonly used terms such as “Isko,” for Iskolar ng Bayan, “Oble” for Oblation, “Acad Oval” for the Academic Oval, “Peyups” for UP with an 80s twang, and other terms that are supposed to sound mighty cool and give the impression of UP students having some kind of a Parseltongue of their own. As a matter of fact, they even give pet names to their much adored subjects under the assumption perhaps that these subjects would love them back: for instance, Eng’g (pronouncedsimply, eng. Say it twice and that’s what you are when sitting in class). In UP, to “prerog” means basically “to sign up for classes that have vacant slots, or that haven’t been filled up yet, at the college offering them or from a teacher who can create a slot for you if you got that swag.”
So how do you prerog (and enrol)? Follow these easy steps and you’ll find doing so is as easy as falling asleep in your seat.
- Enrollment requirements (Form 5, ID, Other Documents Needed for Assessment)
- Leisure activities that do not require vast spaces or athletic courts, but are guaranteed to help pass time
- It is understandable that you are still in summer/sembreak mode, but this is a special occasion and you must get to campus early on the date of enrollment. (How to know if you are on time? If you see a star in the sky that is not the sun, you are just on time. If it’s impossible to tell because if it’s cloudy outside, another way to tell is if Manong Guard is wearing a navy blue uniform or he is in a dormant state/not even there at all)
- Set up camp. Installation of tent is optional, depending on which college you are camping by. Bonfires will not be allowed so if you brought marshmallows you will have to eat them unroasted. Take in a substantial breakfast that is heavier than a pack of marshmallows.
- While waiting, know the subjects you were not able to get and make a mental list of what you want to take as replacement. (Tip: do not take a GE that unknowing freshman clamor to get; you’re not likely to be accommodated. Try for subjects with less “popular appeal” for sure slots, and a less mainstream peg altogether. If it’s a PE you’re lacking, you might have better odds and less stress all throughout the semester if you opt to take mah jongg, birdwatching, or Scrabble.)
- Follow the procedure for enrolment determined by your college, and get your CRS subjects validated at the Office of the University Registrar (OUR). What you will have now is your (incomplete) Form 5A.
- Your journey begins. Make a dash in Olympic record-setting time to the college offering the first class you intend to prerog for. (Tip: prerog first for the more appealing/high-demand subjects because slots are likely to run out sooner! Duh.)
- Follow the signs indicating the procedure for prerogging, assuming you are a UP student and can follow directions. (Note: you will not see the word “prerog” anywhere, but you will be aptly guided). Lines may be long, so make sure your camping equipment is ready and food supply remains high.
- The last (and likely the only) step you’ll encounter will be the e-prerog. This is the moment of truth. On a computer screen you will see which classes have vacant slots and all the info corresponding to it. If the schedule fits yours, just your luck. All you’ll have to do is agree to sign up.
- If all fails, your last option is to hunt down a teacher. Sometimes it is okay to wait. Beware of monsters. They are really more afraid of you.
- Repeat steps 5-8 for the next subjects you will be prerogging.
- Check the time. Is it past 7AM? Better think of things to do and places to go to pass time, for the guard at the OUR will tell you to come back in the afternoon. Is it past 3PM? No hope, come back the next day.
- Get a number, line up patiently, fall asleep in your seat.
- When it is your turn at the window, submit your Form 5A, now adorned with the subjects you have prerogged for. Your blood and sweat, your pride.
- Sit down again and wait for your name to be called. By the time you have to go to Window 5, your Form 5 will have been printed.
- Proceed to payment at the designated center, which will be in any building except for the Cashier’s office. You may now take all the time in the world. A newly introduced option to pay online (aka at a bank) will significantly reduce the emergence of unwarranted campsites.
- Congratulations! You have now managed to prerog and enroll!
DISCLAIMER: Procedure may differ in some respects depending on which college you belong to. I happen to be a student at the OUR, or a cross-registrant from some other campus too cool to be taking any subject there.
I was supposed to have packaged this off as an actual “how-to” article and submit it to a genuine How-To site, but then I thought against it because apparently it would be too cool for one as well.
Found this lying around on my desk. Just a little reminder :D
My obtaining of an unassuming Sheaffer ballpoint has warranted an equally simplistic review.
I would willingly write in cursive at every instance called for.